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“In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.”

Ephesians 5:28

This verse states one of the key principles for a successful marriage: LOVE

The concept of Love is one that lends itself to diverse interpretations and is often fiercely contested in debates that ultimately lead nowhere. However, the Bible gives us guidance on what Love constitutes and the context in which it is used.

If asked what the definition of Love is, most people will undoubtedly incorporate some description of a deep emotional feeling in their response. Love absolutely has an element of deep affection, but that alone does not fully encapsulate it, neither does Love commence with a feeling. The feeling of Love arises as a result of attention and care.

The feeling of being in Love is your recompense for the attention and care you give to something or someone. Usually, people think of it the other way around: if asked why someone would spend so much time on a computer game, it would not be out of place to hear “Because I love it!”. However, analyzing the sequence of events, you will find that they began by spending some time on the game, then giving the game some consideration – for example, caring whether they won or lost, and all this while, their affection for the game is growing, which in turn feeds the attention and care they give and so on.

Most people care about their bodies at least enough not to want to loose any part of it, they look after themself. So for example, if you had a back ache, you wouldn’t seek to get rid of your back simply because it is causing you pain, would you? Probably not! You would get it massaged, try to relieve the pressure on it, you would give it real care and attention. This is a demonstration that you love your body.

The verse is calling on husbands to love their own wife. A husband should find out what constitutes care and attention for his own wife and give it – willingly and consistently. As discussed in the Two becoming one post, a husband that does this actually demonstrates that he loves himself and is invested in building a successful and long lasting marriage.

“This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”

Genesis 2:24